The Beginning


Anarchism positions itself in libertarian resistance to Authoritarian Marxism, opposing its call for post revolutionary centralized state, even what is depicted as a transitional necessity.” I thought Emma Goldman quote was avant-garde. I guess I am always thinking about connecting ideas, the events of the past leading to the present. It is always nice to feel self-important, even though ones life can be meaningless. It is always nice to dream, but never become discouraged by separating reality from the illusions. I want to do many things. I am who I am. And nothing lasts forever.

The Beginning

I switched my major for the last time. I will have earned a Bachelor’s degree and can still end up as a server at a restaurant –in face of poor economic conditions and the limitations placed against me– in no place to change things as they are. Despite this fact, I could make connections that opens doors, in the sense, I am of use to the establishment. The most important thing to understand is that my mental attitude and confidence have a huge impact on how far I will go, as much as my natural ability.

I can cite Keynes, Friedman, or even Hayek, but I have no understanding about what those men mean and how I can relate their theories to a wider audience with my own personal views. I pursue knowledge for the sake of knowledge to influence people’s thinking and effect change. I value achievement brought about from people inherent potential that connects with other individual lives vicariously to create better societies. People with seemingly no genuine ability or first hand knowledge about a subject such as the global political economy, feel compelled to share their thoughts at the cost of criticism. However, if I am a former diplomat from a region, I can share my insights about what leaders are thinking, or as an executive consultant, I can share insights about corporate goals–fine. If I spend sometime in a country as some visiting student, I might have some interesting perspectives to share with Americans whom never been there–also fine. The pivotal point is that I do not want critics to say I have no insights or personal understanding. I do not want the public to say I am spouting opinions or other peoples opinions without any ability; nor do I want critics to define me or my professional career. Secretary of State Condoleeza rice at the Peace Corps 2008 Worldwide Country Director Conference answered a colleague of mine:

“It is awfully important, awfully critical, not to let somebody else define your horizons. You’re going to find what it is you want to do and who you want to be, and the last question you want to ask is, ‘Is that what I should do as a result of my gender or my race or my nationality or my disability?’ Just don’t let anybody ask that question. And most importantly, don’t ask it yourself.”

I wouldn’t want people to see my professional career as a business consultant, an educator, an ambassador for the government and/or non-government organization, and a writer for the general public. I wouldn’t want them to see it as this or that …. but varied. I don’t want to be pigeon-hold. If placed into a group as a Political Economist, I can properly lead the audience, which maximizes my utility. I want to be this and that and I want to be seen that way. More of an everyones woman who has strength that can bring something to a moment without saying much.

I can say much with little. There’s this thought and there is history behind it. I understand that we must set miles stones for ourselves, along the way, and not get discouraged by the day-to-day grind. This marks the beginning of my journey to self discovery.

The dreamer in me.

2 thoughts on “The Beginning

  1. I disagree with Condoleeza Rice’s suggestion. The question Rice tells your colleague not to heed are valid and important ones to ask. Sociologically speaking, our gender, race, nationality, and disability tell us who we are. No human being is all powerful. We all have limits and limitations. Furthermore, society and other people will ask and will challenge us all the time to answer it. I feel it is crucially important to define our personal boundaries. This step in everyday life best equips us to negotiate with others. Furthermore, as a Secretary of State, Rice should know better than to suggest that anyone can prevent ( or just not let) others asking it. Why shouldn’t we ask? In fact, by facing the question, we can move beyond it. So what if my disability dictated that I behave in one way and not another. At the least, I would not have been afraid to let MY disability define me. This doesn’t mean it defines me forever. Life is full of change. Perhaps, Rice should do better to emphasize being adaptable in face of change. “Is that what I should do as a result of my gender or my race or my nationality or my disability?” This is the first question I would ask myself. These categories give me an identity from which to stare beyond my horizons. To lead, one must take the first step.


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