Maybe She’s Different

In Jean-Pierre Jeunet’s film Le Fabuleux Destin d’Amerie Poulain, the painter Mr. Dufayel talks about the secluded look of a girl drinking a glass of water in the Luncheon of the Boating Party painting by Pierre-Auguste Renoir. He says, “After all these years, the only person I still can’t capture is the girl with the glass of water. She’s in the Middle yet she’s outside. ‘Maybe she’s different’. Isolated souls are resigned to their suffering as quoted by Proust, “we loved outside ourselves and perceive that our love is a function of our sorrow, when in reality it is such people more than any other who inspires love.”

I am reminded of an enigmatic scene of this young woman who picks up her cup by the sleeve and then tastes her dolce de leche. A gentleman takes a seat next to her. She grows nervous by his presence. For a few seconds she entertains his gaze and then looks away. The flow of traffic subsides, headlights too bright for the unusual quietness to the loud urban city bustling with life. He says to her, “How are you planning to make your amends?” The directness of his attention is marked by the peculiar intellectual mannerism of a great thinker, the way he touches each ends of his finger tips in deep thought. She looks at the masculine form of his well shaped hands. She looks at him and says to him, “Through living does one make their amends.” As an asserted fact he says, “Okay. So, change the way you think.”

After putting much thought and dreaming of a paradise future. I awakened in great sadness. Delusions were clouding my mind. I had awakened to reality. All the questions I have answered in the midst of my dreamland disintegrated. I lost my way on the walk of life. There were too many roads. The roads were often bad instead of good. One wrong step and you find myself lost in its complex road unable to find your way back. In the end, there is no turning back to begin with. Ironic how there is no going back, yet realized when you have reached your end. Turning back means to erase a mistake. Find your own path again. Wake up from your delusions. Never use the word “can’t” but don’t overuse the word “can”. So is reality better than dreams, hopes, wishes.” What’s the use of being able to see, if we don’t understand what is right in front of us. In the end, we are all blind. But I withdrew into an isolated world without waiting for the road to change, creating paradise, a dream-like world of fantasy for the hopeless romantics.

A few understand the process to better oneself. To own one’s mistakes or failures is one of the hardest things to do, and each failure is a blessing. In fact, one must accept life as it exist, not to shy away from growth, whether it may be painful or not. It is not only a want to better oneself, but a responsibility one have to others and share our experiences. That one may help others avoid the same pitfalls encountered. For others will see it or not, we are all in this together and need to help others selflessly to better all our lives. And believe it or not, you are in paradise whether you see it or not. It hide at times, but all things good and bad shall come to pass. Every action, good or bad, has consequences.

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Isolated souls are resigned to their suffering as quoted by Proust, “we loved outside ourselves and perceive that our love is a function of our sorrow, when in reality it is such people more than any others who inspires love.”

 

 

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Credit: A conversation with a Chicago artist & philosophical thinker named J. Cleary